Hi! all the rocking commedy fans! i have a very funny poem for you all.. It is titled as the muddle-head I knew a man from Petushkee, As muddle-headed as could be. He always got mixed up with clothes; He wore his mittens on his toes,
Forgot his collar in his haste; And tied his tie around his waist. What a muddle-head was he, That man who lived in Petushkee. They told him as he went about, 'You've got your coat inside out!' And when they saw his hat, they said: 'You've put a saucepan on your head!'
What a muddle-head was he That man who lived in Petushkee
At lunch he scratched a piece of bread, And spread some butter on his head, He put his walking-stick to bed, And he stood in the rack instead. What a muddle-head was he, That man who lived in Petushkee. He walked up to a tram one day
And climbed in very sprightly. Conductor thought that he would pay, Instead, he said politely: 'Parding your beggon,
Kister Monductor, I’m off for a week’s vacation; I stop you to beg your cramway tar As soon as we reach the station.’ Conductor got a fright And didn’t sleep the night What a muddle head was he, That man who lived in Petushkee. He rushed into the first cafe: ‘A railway ticket please. One way.’
And at the ticket office, he said: ‘A slice of tea and a cup of bread.’ What a muddle head was he, The man who lived in Petushkee!
He passed the man collecting the fares, And entered the carriage awaiting repairs, That stood on a siding, all by itself. Half of his luggage he put on a shelf, The rest on the floor, his coat on his lap And settled himself for a bit of a nap.
All at once he raised his head, I must have been asleep,' he said. 'Hey, what stop is this?' he cried. 'Petushkee', a voice replied. Once again he closed his eyes And dreamt he was in Paradise. When he woke, he looked about, Raised the window and leaned out. 'I've seen this town before, I believe, Is it Kharkove, is it Kiev? Tell me where I am', he cried. In Petushkee,' a voice replied. And so again he settled down And dreamt the world is upside down When he woke, he looked about
Raised the window and looked out. I seem to know this station too, Is it Nalchik or Baku? Tell me what it's called,' he cried. 'Petushkee,' a voice replied. Up he jumped; 'It's a crime! I've been riding all this time, And here I am where I began! That's no way to treat a man!' What, a muddle-head was he That man who lived in Petushkee!
Lol, that's pretty... um...don't know how to call how it was.
yeah. Pretty, um
That's ma future. :P
Lol, good one.
Gerard Nolst Trenité - The Chaos (1922) Dearest creature in creation Studying English pronunciation, I will teach you in my verse Sounds like corpse, corps, horse and worse.
I will keep you, Susy, busy, Make your head with heat grow dizzy; Tear in eye, your dress you'll tear; Queer, fair seer, hear my prayer.
Pray, console your loving poet, Make my coat look new, dear, sew it! Just compare heart, hear and heard, Dies and diet, lord and word.
Sword and sward, retain and Britain (Mind the latter how it's written). Made has not the sound of bade, Say-said, pay-paid, laid but plaid.
Now I surely will not plague you With such words as vague and ague, But be careful how you speak, Say: gush, bush, steak, streak, break, bleak ,
Previous, precious, fuchsia, via Recipe, pipe, studding-sail, choir; Woven, oven, how and low, Script, receipt, shoe, poem, toe.
Say, expecting fraud and trickery: Daughter, laughter and Terpsichore, Branch, ranch, measles, topsails, aisles, Missiles, similes, reviles.
Wholly, holly, signal, signing, Same, examining, but mining, Scholar, vicar, and cigar, Solar, mica, war and far.
From "desire": desirable-admirable from "admire", Lumber, plumber, bier, but brier, Topsham, brougham, renown, but known, Knowledge, done, lone, gone, none, tone,
Please don't monkey with the geyser, Don't peel 'taters with my razor, Rather say in accents pure: Nature, stature and mature.
Pious, impious, limb, climb, glumly, Worsted, worsted, crumbly, dumbly, Conquer, conquest, vase, phase, fan, Wan, sedan and artisan.
The th will surely trouble you More than r, ch or w. Say then these phonetic gems: Thomas, thyme, Theresa, Thames.
Thompson, Chatham, Waltham, Streatham, There are more but I forget 'em- Wait! I've got it: Anthony, Lighten your anxiety.
The archaic word albeit Does not rhyme with eight-you see it; With and forthwith, one has voice, One has not, you make your choice.
Shoes, goes, does *. Now first say: finger; Then say: singer, ginger, linger. Real, zeal, mauve, gauze and gauge, Marriage, foliage, mirage, age,
Hero, heron, query, very, Parry, tarry fury, bury, Dost, lost, post, and doth, cloth, loth, Job, Job, blossom, bosom, oath.
Faugh, oppugnant, keen oppugners, Bowing, bowing, banjo-tuners Holm you know, but noes, canoes, Puisne, truism, use, to use?
Though the difference seems little, We say actual, but victual, Seat, sweat, chaste, caste, Leigh, eight, height, Put, nut, granite, and unite.
Reefer does not rhyme with deafer, Feoffer does, and zephyr, heifer. Dull, bull, Geoffrey, George, ate, late, Hint, pint, senate, but sedate.
Gaelic, Arabic, pacific, Science, conscience, scientific; Tour, but our, dour, succour, four, Gas, alas, and Arkansas.
Say manoeuvre, yacht and vomit, Next omit, which differs from it Bona fide, alibi Gyrate, dowry and awry.
Sea, idea, guinea, area, Psalm, Maria, but malaria. Youth, south, southern, cleanse and clean, Doctrine, turpentine, marine.
Compare alien with Italian, Dandelion with battalion, Rally with ally; yea, ye, Eye, I, ay, aye, whey, key, quay!
Say aver, but ever, fever, Neither, leisure, skein, receiver. Never guess-it is not safe, We say calves, valves, half, but Ralf.
Starry, granary, canary, Crevice, but device, and eyrie, Face, but preface, then grimace, Phlegm, phlegmatic, ass, glass, bass.
Bass, large, target, gin, give, verging, Ought, oust, joust, and scour, but scourging; Ear, but earn; and ere and tear Do not rhyme with here but heir.
Mind the o of off and often Which may be pronounced as orphan, With the sound of saw and sauce; Also soft, lost, cloth and cross.
Pudding, puddle, putting. Putting? Yes: at golf it rhymes with shutting. Respite, spite, consent, resent. Liable, but Parliament.
Seven is right, but so is even, Hyphen, roughen, nephew, Stephen, Monkey, donkey, clerk and jerk, Asp, grasp, wasp, demesne, cork, work.
A of valour, vapid vapour, S of news (compare newspaper), G of gibbet, gibbon, gist, I of antichrist and grist,
Differ like diverse and divers, Rivers, strivers, shivers, fivers. Once, but nonce, toll, doll, but roll, Polish, Polish, poll and poll.
Pronunciation-think of Psyche!- Is a paling, stout and spiky. Won't it make you lose your wits Writing groats and saying "grits"?
It's a dark abyss or tunnel Strewn with stones like rowlock, gunwale, Islington, and Isle of Wight, Housewife, verdict and indict.
Don't you think so, reader, rather, Saying lather, bather, father? Finally, which rhymes with enough, Though, through, bough, cough, hough, sough, tough??
Hiccough has the sound of sup... My advice is: GIVE IT UP!
wow nice one! And pretty long! Who wrote it?
I guess from the text, Gerard Nolst Trenité. but I had never read anything from this poet.
He was a Dutch teacher of the English language. The Chaos seems to be what he is best known for today. I'm wondering if he was forcing his students to pronounce all of it. This is a brilliand poem. Thanks for sharing.
Latest edition by Adventure-Time, Oct 12 2020 13:09:34
Thank you. Its a very well researched and complecated poem. Wonder how he could come up with it.